We won't be homeless.

It's pretty official. We're getting the keys and signing the lease on our new place this afternoon. Which means, we can start moving in tonight! The only thing that might be in the way is the carpet might be a little damp - they're cleaning it this morning.

What a relief. It is nice to know that we'll have the whole weekend to move, not just one day. We've run out of boxes, so that means we're going to drive all our clothes over, hang them in the closets, and take back our empty boxes for more.

The amount of stuff we have is unreal. It never looked like we had that much stuff because I can do a pretty good job of squirreling things out of sight. I've been giving things away and selling things left and right, and we still have a lot left. I posted a bag of baby clothes for give away yesterday and the woman who came to get them was floored. By the time she got here, I had accrued 3 bags of stuff: bibs, car seat cover, snowsuits, a front pack baby carrier, some sleepsacks, burp cloths, etc. I was originally just going to give her the mismatched clothes that wouldn't sell for much on Craigslist anyway, but after I talked to her I just felt like I should give her more. I'm so glad I did. She was so grateful she cried. That made my day feel good enough that I won't miss the $30 or whatever I would have made anyway.

Oliver is going to my parents' this afternoon and spending the night. I talked to him this morning to tell him what is going to happen, but really.. I have no idea how much he understands. "They" say that he understands more than we think, but how much more? This morning I was a little worried that he might think we've abandoned him at Grandma & Grandpa's.  Does he understand when I say I'll see him in a couple days? Does he know what days are?

I can't help but compare him to the dogs I've had... You leave them at the kennel to go on vacation, and they think they're being dropped off at the pound forever. When you come back, they're so happy to see you because they thought you were gone for good. Do you think that's what it's like for him? I know he likes it at my parents... he likes that they have tons of toys. He gets all the attention in the world there, but I still wonder if he misses me and worries that I might not come back.

If he doesn't understand what we say to him, the world must be totally weird to him. Imagine riding in an elevator: You step into a box, you get a weird feeling (You don't know what gravity or anything is like that!) and then the doors open and the magic box has transported you someplace new. How weird! We're going to send him away for a couple of days, but then when we pick him up we'll be going home to a completely new place. He'll have all of his stuff, but everything will be different. What will he think? I wish I could know how much he understands.

P.S. If you want our new address, email me. I sent out a blanket generic message to most people, but if I left you off of the list... My apologies. It was hot and I was tired when I wrote it. :)

Waiting.

Today is the day we find out if we get our awesome apartment. I'm totally excited. There is no reason that we shouldn't get it. We've got the money, we aren't criminal thugs, and in general we rock. HOWEVER. That doesn't stop my brain from thinking that maybe they'll find out about that time when I didn't return my library books for 2 weeks or that they'll somehow KNOW about the detentions I got in middle school. Like they would even matter.

Irrational, but I am kinda excited and nervous for it. I even found a swimsuit to use in their swimming pool! It isn't so glamorous - I mean, really. It isn't that attractive at all. But I'm not going to fall out of it anywhere and it is a step better than anything else I've found. I would actually like the suit in a smaller size - It is almost a piece of retro throwback awesome. In fact, I tried it on in a smaller size and liked the body of it, but couldn't fit into the boobs of it. Hence, I bumped up a size(s), and then the boobs at least fit in it even if the rest of my body is swallowed up. I'm hoping people will just pay attention to my arms and legs. Somehow they manage to look pretty good. Considering it was only a $25 suit, it isn't like I can't buy another one should The Dream Suit come along someday. (As a side note... if somebody could figure out how to Frankenstein the bottom of the smaller suit to the top of the bigger suit, you know... I'd love you for just about forever.)

Oliver is 8 months old. For his special celebratory event, he was sent to Grandma and Grandpa's place, which has A/C. Jared and I celebrated by moving the heaviest dresser you could ever find down from the 4th floor of an apartment building. It was only $20, though, so it was worthwhile. We also hauled in a new desk and ditched the old one. Jared decided the old desk was too small. He saw the new desk at Ikea, liked it, but I said, "No Jared. Too expensive." (Such is my lot in life.) So then I went on to Craigslist, found the exact desk (my lucky day!) and took her home for 1/3 retail price. Only one visible scratch on it. Am I great or am I great?

Tell her what she's won, Bob! A NEW CAR!

So I didn't win a new car. I did, however, win a subscription to Canadian Family magazine. I was one of the lucky individuals over at Ironic Mom's blog to be chosen at random.  Best luck I've had all week!

So, in case any of you have clicked your way through to my page from there... welcome!

Now. Back to your regularly scheduled time slot of my whinging and bellyaching.

It is hot. Hot. Capital H. Hot.  As in, we don't have air conditioning. Hot. As in, the baby wears only a diaper and still is sticky with sweat. As in, Jared is most definitely a nutter. He won't let me open the windows for fear of the menacing allergens waiting to storm in through our screens. I accept this in some ways, but... you know. The thermostat is singing another tune entirely.

Jared: Allergies! Runny nose! I could take a Claritin to fix it, but where would the fun in that be?
Thermostat display: 80F
Jared: But my eyes itch!
Thermostat display: 80F
Jared: But! But!
Thermostat display: 80F.

The thermostat wins.  The ceiling fans are on nonstop. Our one box fan has been working sweat shop hours. The mini desk fan I had coughed her last death rattle some time weeks ago. THE WINDOWS NEED TO BE OPENED.

This may be why I am getting antsy about moving into one of our new apartment options. Air conditioning. CENTRAL air conditioning.  I'm sure my antsiness has nothing to do with, oh... you know. Needing to be out of here in eleven days. Because eleven days is plenty of time to find a new home and move into it, right? Good. I thought so too.

P.S. If the new realtor gets into a car accident or if a piano falls on her head right before our scheduled showing today, I'll just take that as my final bad omen and move on...

Practically a realtor.

I've been busy. Jared's mother flew in for Mother's Day weekend and we were too busy doing nothing to make a new blog post. :)

On Mother's Day itself I went to go visit my mommy while Jared studied for his final exams. While driving home from a restaurant, we found some baby duckies all by themselves on the side of the road. I rescued them.

All seven of them.

Since then, I've been showing our apartment like crazy. Lots of interest, lots of people asking for applications. I'm 99% sure I could be a real estate agent. The only thing holding me back is my lack of a poofy and/or feathered hairstyle. And maybe some shoulder pads.

SO. While it's great and all that people want to move in to our place, what isn't so great is that we've not got anywhere to move into yet. I've been in and out of so many apartments, and none feel just "right" to me. There are no shortages of shitholes around here. In fact, I would say that the off campus area is rife with them. The problem is that we're looking for something a little more home-like, a little less trenches of WWI-esque.

I can find great places. If Jared had a car and could drive to school, we'd have found a home 10 times over. I've found some true winners - but near campus or on a bus line? None yet. It's no wonder everyone loves our apartment... I think it's the only place within a mile of campus that could pass as a home. (It also doesn't hurt that I am a high quality interior decorator, there is a cute baby showing the apartment, and it smells like wildberry muffins in here.)

I have high hopes for some apartments this afternoon. One has a porch, and FREE IN-UNIT LAUNDRY. I love that feature. The other one is a bit spendy, but close to campus, well kept and spacious. Cross your fingers that one of them can be our home.

Oliver's opinions of the apartments are indecipherable. I don't know if the shrieks mean "Yes, I love it here!" or "Why did you bring me here, Mother? You're wasting my time." For him I'm looking for:

1. Wood or laminate flooring (He tends to lick/bite carpet.)
2. A bedroom that would afford him a dresser.
3. A dishwasher
4. Free laundry
5. Parking
6. Non claw foot death trap tub.
7. Space for a table for family dinner time.
8. Yard or nearby park, sidewalks etc for walks.

That shouldn't be so hard, right? Ha. Right.

Minivans.

Last night my parents watched Oliver so we could go out and have fun. I drove their new VW Routan home, and I have to admit... I want a minivan now.

 I am willing to trade my social cool factor for convenience. I felt pretty BA cruising down the road... pull out in front of my minivan? I WON'T GO DOWN WITHOUT A FIGHT! Step in front of my little Yaris? Um, excuse me, don't mind me while I quietly CRUMPLE LIKE TIN FOIL.

There were so many buttons. The doors! The automatic ease with which they can be opened! The window shade screens, the DVD players, the cupholders! I'm sold. I am willing to look like a soccer mom pulling up to parties just so I can have a passenger seat AND a car seat in the car at the same time! Novel concept for us.

Don't even get me started on the Sirius radio. I'm willing to bet that very little can top the feeling of driving down the interstate with 40's hits playing on the radio, COMMERCIAL FREE. Makes you feel like a whole new woman. Bonus 900 awesome points.

But anyway. I got to drive the new van for the night. I picked up Jared and we eventually wound up at a friend's going away party. Sometimes I wish I were more of a normal college student, but after last night I decided I am okay with my boring life. Less heart attack inducing, I think. Less liver failure, for sure.

The party was only a few blocks away so we could walk. I ended up being the designated hair-holder-backer for a couple of people, which isn't fun but is sometimes necessary on the college scene.  Definitely made me realize that I'm not missing that much staying home with Oliver. When it comes down to it, I'd rather risk the occasional diaper seepage than have to deal with full grown people's vomit. Helping people stumble safely to his or her own bed makes for interesting stories, but it really is something I'd rather avoid. Let's just pause for an imaginary pat on the back for me potentially saving people's lives.

Now, after that I think I am done with any parties for quite some time.

BUT! Anyway. None of that really has anything to do with what I wanted to say in this post.

Tomorrow evening, Jared has to go to a strange dinner for doing well in his lab class. Besides some sort of lame certificate & a free meal, we don't know what he gets. Neither of us is thrilled at the prospect of him going. Boo that he has to go, but yay that he did well. ("Well" in this case is a relative term. Everyone else in the class sucked a lot. He only sucked a little bit, so that means he did "well.")

Tomorrow afternoon is another apartment showing, so I've got my fingers crossed that it will be the perfect next home for us. It's in a great location, so it's potential is high.

Tuesday I'm going to work on artful arrangement of our apartment so we can list it for rent.

I'm going to try to squeeze in some time to visit some condos my parents are looking at buying. Probably on Wednesday or something like that. 

Thursday night Jared's mom flies in for a weekend visit.

Saturday is Jared's first final, so he'll be busy all week as well. At least this year is almost over with.

I may or may not be too busy to post for a little bit here. If so, accept my apologies. I'll make sure to upload videos so you'll forgive me.

Apartment... Why do you do me like you do?

Dear Apartment,

I loved you from Hello. You are a convenient drive to everywhere I want to go. You are spacious enough to make me feel at home, without making me feel lonesome. The neighbors are good. Your price is right. I've done nothing but treat you well, and you think you can walk all over me.

First you decided to rain down nasty water in my bathroom. While I was in the hospital. Giving birth to that nearly TEN POUND baby. It was a mess to come home to. I understand, you were jealous. I get that you needed attention. Really, I get that. I have forgiven you.

But again? You think you can rain poop water on me, AGAIN!?! Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice, shame on me.

And if you think it has just been those two incidents, you're kidding yourself. What about the hot/cold water issue in our bathtub? I would really prefer to have both types of water available to me, at all times. What about the time your ceiling in the living room started cracking and sagging? The neighbors' party upstairs is no reason to let that happen. And let us not forget to mention the ants you let in last summer. Into our living room. We didn't even have any food in the apartment yet, and still... you let in the ants. Simply unacceptable. Inexcusable.  Did you really think we could go on like this? We can't. I won't.

Last weekend, when all of the sinks in the building had water back up into them, that was the last straw. The city inspector is coming by, and I don't think he will want to hear any of your excuses. I'm giving you an ultimatum: Shape up or I'll be searching the MLS list for another lover. I deserve better than you're giving me.

Sincerely,
Andi