A poorly constructed metaphor about my baby and Bon Jovi.

We listen to a lot of music in this house. Pandora radio is always streaming over my iPod so that we can accomplish the most basic of tasks. The only way I can get any housework done is if I dance and flail wildly enough to entertain Doobie from across the room.

He has definite favorites - The Killers, Journey, and Ingrid Michelson get a lot of air time. Lately, though, he has been favoring Bon Jovi's song It's My Life. It's his theme song. I don't approve. I don't know how it sneaked its way into our mix but its stuck now.

"It's my life
It's now or never
I ain't gonna live forever
I just wanna live while I'm alive"

He takes this to mean that he should be busy "living" instead of sleeping. All the time. Sleep is for losers. Why sleep at night when you can wake up and yell every 3 hours?

He used to be so good at sleeping at night. We would put him down at 10:30 or maybe 11 and he would sleep until 8AM. It was glorious. I had plenty of energy to play with him all day long because I got to rest up for quite some time without him.

But ever since he's been rolling, we've had to stop the swaddle and our house has turned into an all night rave. Want to know who is always up and partying at 3AM? We are. The tinny crappy classical is pumping and we're trying to rock him to sleep. The second we put him back down he turns his crib into a one man mosh pit.

We're fighting a losing battle. No matter what we've done we can't get him to sleep. The doctor said we can now put him down on his tummy because he flips within 5 minutes of us putting him down anyway. When he flips, he moves too far to the side and gets his arms stuck. He screams when he can't get his arms out. We disentangle him and he is fine for a little while. We thought that adding the  Breathable Baby Bumper would stop him frmo getting his arm stuck and maybe let us sleep at night but...


We were wrong. I think he hates the bumpers because he can't see out. The bumpers look nice and they were a snap to put up, but Oliver just isn't having any of this. He would take a scuffed up face over not being able to see.

In fact,Privacy Information I think his hatred for the bumpers is what made him do this yesterday:

It is mildly terrifying because he isn't good at balancing. In fact, moments after I took that picture he got so excited that he let go and fell straight back. He doesn't have the fear of falling yet so he doesn't try to catch himself with his arms or drop to his knees... He just dead man trust-falls straight back and his skull thumps on the mattress.

I asked Oliver why he feels like he has to do this, and all he could do was quote this stupid Bon Jovi lyric:

"You better stand tall
When they're calling you out
Don't bend, don't break
Baby, don't back down"

What can I say? I guess it is his life. And it is now or never.  I foresee a few trips to the ER in this kid's life. Curse you, Bon Jovi.

Lent, and why I hate it.

Lent is here. Roll out the fish fry signs all around the Midwest. Cue the McFishNasty sandwich commercials. I hate Lent.

Before any of you lay into me... I get the point of Lent. Really, I do.

Except that I'm not Catholic, and I don't care. So I will be eating steak. Please don't give me any flack about it because you're not going to change my mind. It is fine and dandy that y'all do that thing you do, just don't expect me to join you. And at the very least, you can look at it this way:

Somebody's gotta keep the beef industry afloat. That person will be me.

So yes, Holier Than Thou Perkins Patron, I am going to enjoy my burger. I am sorry if I offended you. And I'm certain that you will be getting plus 10,000,000 heaven super bonus brownie fun time points for mouthing a prayer at me. Thats exactly how things work, I'm sure.

SO! Now that I've admonished that woman from Lent 2008, I can continue with my updates. I feel much better.

Non swaddling is really not flying in our household. There has been much wailing and gnashing of teeth. (How is that for Lenten suffering, Perkins Woman!?!?!!)

He just won't sleep very well at night without being wrapped up. He falls asleep and stays asleep for a few hours but he is constantly waking himself up at night with his unstoppable flailing of limbs. Sometimes he does go back to sleep on his own, but it still disrupts my sleep and makes me grumpy. I wish I could turn off the part of my brain saying, "What!?! A single mew coming over the baby monitor?! WAKE UP FROM YOUR DEEP SLUMBER RIGHT NOW!"

I do get a decent amount of sleep, but it is interrupted and fretful. It doesn't help that Oliver is grumpy the next day, either. I've been swaddling him for naps. That way, I can leave him on the bed next to me and watch to make sure he's not on his tummy. I wish we had one of the gurney board things they strapped him to when he had his EEG. He couldn't roll over AND he could be swaddled. Luxurious.

Yesterday I managed to make it to the SPHC meeting, but it wasn't easy. Oliver was sleeping and I had to wake him up to get ready to go. Obstacle one. I changed Oliver, fed him, and changed him before I got ready to go myself. As soon as I had everything together and was getting him strapped in to his carseat, cue explosive poop. Obstacle two. After I re-changed Oliver, I got him back into the carseat, out into the car. But then I had to clear the snow off of my car. Obstacle three. Then I made it there but there was no parking in sight. Obstacle four. I finally found a spot and dropped my change holder under my car. I had to fish it out of the nasty slush. Obstacle five.

The good news, is:
1. I did not quit even though it was hard to get him out the door. It was tempting to go back to sleep.
2. The meeting was worth it. People were totally nice there.
3. There was Snickers salad.

All in all, I'll take that as a win. Now if I could only shake this low iron tiredness/weakness, I'd be all set for today. I think I'm going to attempt more cupcakes later this afternoon. So far, my decorating skills suck but at least they still taste good.