Wednesday, February 24, 2010

A poorly constructed metaphor about my baby and Bon Jovi.

We listen to a lot of music in this house. Pandora radio is always streaming over my iPod so that we can accomplish the most basic of tasks. The only way I can get any housework done is if I dance and flail wildly enough to entertain Doobie from across the room.

He has definite favorites - The Killers, Journey, and Ingrid Michelson get a lot of air time. Lately, though, he has been favoring Bon Jovi's song It's My Life. It's his theme song. I don't approve. I don't know how it sneaked its way into our mix but its stuck now.

"It's my life
It's now or never
I ain't gonna live forever
I just wanna live while I'm alive"

He takes this to mean that he should be busy "living" instead of sleeping. All the time. Sleep is for losers. Why sleep at night when you can wake up and yell every 3 hours?

He used to be so good at sleeping at night. We would put him down at 10:30 or maybe 11 and he would sleep until 8AM. It was glorious. I had plenty of energy to play with him all day long because I got to rest up for quite some time without him.

But ever since he's been rolling, we've had to stop the swaddle and our house has turned into an all night rave. Want to know who is always up and partying at 3AM? We are. The tinny crappy classical is pumping and we're trying to rock him to sleep. The second we put him back down he turns his crib into a one man mosh pit.

We're fighting a losing battle. No matter what we've done we can't get him to sleep. The doctor said we can now put him down on his tummy because he flips within 5 minutes of us putting him down anyway. When he flips, he moves too far to the side and gets his arms stuck. He screams when he can't get his arms out. We disentangle him and he is fine for a little while. We thought that adding the  Breathable Baby Bumper would stop him frmo getting his arm stuck and maybe let us sleep at night but...


We were wrong. I think he hates the bumpers because he can't see out. The bumpers look nice and they were a snap to put up, but Oliver just isn't having any of this. He would take a scuffed up face over not being able to see.

In fact,Privacy Information I think his hatred for the bumpers is what made him do this yesterday:


It is mildly terrifying because he isn't good at balancing. In fact, moments after I took that picture he got so excited that he let go and fell straight back. He doesn't have the fear of falling yet so he doesn't try to catch himself with his arms or drop to his knees... He just dead man trust-falls straight back and his skull thumps on the mattress.

I asked Oliver why he feels like he has to do this, and all he could do was quote this stupid Bon Jovi lyric:

"You better stand tall
When they're calling you out
Don't bend, don't break
Baby, don't back down"

What can I say? I guess it is his life. And it is now or never.  I foresee a few trips to the ER in this kid's life. Curse you, Bon Jovi.

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